.:Returned:.

(This post actually gets important at the end. Or at least it is to me.)
Yo dudes, I'm finally fucking back from being cut open and shit. Whoo...
So you know in my last journal entry (if people actually read these) I said i would draw a shit load and blah blah blah, yeah well that went out the window, cause i was hooked up and had 50 billion things stuck into me like my heperin drip in my left hand and another drip in there that took my blood in which they weakened my left hand and I can't grip a fucking pencil properly oh and beside the fact tubes and shit would get in the way, i haven't drawn shit :I I still have two holes in them. I attempted it but it failed...This is quite depressing actually, I mean all i love to do is draw though I'm not great but it's still fun to screw around with things. Also i can't play guitar...I hate this.
I'm trying to think of a bright side to mention...um, I'm not dead? I don't fucking know, lolz xD Oh actually I'm a clockwork killer, that's cool P; Well point is I'm back but i wont be posting for quite sometime. I may do a post every so often but still that's pretty pointless...unless you have a lot of followers on here i find posting stuff pointless :U (I don't have many followers xD or viewers )

Also i just want to make a small mention to my Dad (he died on the 27th of December eight years ago) I just want to say I love you and though it's been such a long time of course i still freaking miss you everyday and that everything i do is for you. I want you to be proud of who I've become even though I'm not proud of myself. You came to visit me in the hospital, mum told me there was a butterfly floating around the third floor outside my window, the butterflies never fly that high but there you were. After these years that have passed though you're not physically with me, you're still always by my side helping me through the shit life throws my way. If anything all i wanted was to die so i could be with you again because you were my idol and my loving father, you were the kindest man though i know your life was rough yourself, it's never easy in this world but you made it so far. I want you to continue watching over me until I'm fragile and old because i know even then we'll never be far apart. It really sucks, it's always the people who don't deserve it and boy do i know life should of showered you with chocolate goodness! I'll never forget the things that you taught me and the joy you bring me. You were the kind of man that could still play cricket with your two daughters though you had one leg and could even smile and laugh when you knew you were going to die. Thank-you for being amazing and for being my Dad, you're the only person who could ever fit that roll perfectly.
^^^^^^^ Okay so that was more like a big mention, but he deserves more than that. The 27th was two days ago I know, but i wasn't up to getting on DA yet (plus i didn't want to make a post of fb cause too many people would see it) Another two mentions to my great uncle Ian (my dads uncle, in which my dad was named after) who died recently this year at the start of December and my only Grandpa who died two years ago a few days before Christmas. These three amazing men that have passed were my idols. My dad was security for the police, my great uncle was in the new zealand army (he was a bren gunner meaning they went first, you have to be so freaking brave to do this job) and my grandpa fought in world war 2, not only were they incredible people but they did incredible things and helped others.

In any case, I'm finally home. (My Christmas is also being held off until next week, so i technically haven't had Christmas yet.)